The Good, The Bad, and The Incredibly Ugly Cars

#19: 1989 Nissan S-Cargo

The S-Cargo was inspired by an old French delivery vehicle, the Citroën 2CV. That’s why it’s called the S-Cargo; because it sounds like “escargot.” It kind of looks like a snail if you squint your eyes, actually.

The S-Cargo has a number of weird little quirks, including notably fragile rear-view mirrors, a warning chime that plays when you hit 60 MPH (apparently a recurring quirk of old Japanese cars), and a completely superfluous back seat with no seat belt or leg room. Also, befitting its snail-like nature, its 75-hp engine would need to chug its little heart out to even get up to 60 MPH. Snails are not meant for the highway.

Speaking of snails, here’s another car that’s slow and dumb-looking.

#18: 1974 Sebring-Vanguard CitiCar

Paint this thing neon-green and put it on a big wire-frame mat, and it’d look just like a tank from one of those old vector computer games. The CitiCar wasn’t meant to be used as a regular everyday vehicle, but rather a short-range substitute for your regular car. The CitiCar used an electric motor, so the idea was that you’d save the gas in your usual car for something important.

Thing is, even for a short hop to the supermarket, no one really wanted to ride around in an orange doorstop that could only go up to 25 miles per hour. If you’re not the kind of person who’d drive a golf cart on a commercial road, you probably wouldn’t want to drive this.

But as doofy as the S-Cargo is, it doesn’t hold a candle to the classic ugly stick victim…